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I often see the words “label” and “identity” used interchangeably, but to me they have rather different connotations. A label is something society thrusts on you, to organize information- keep track of possible discrimination, to access services and accommodations or medical treatment in the case of disabilities and medical conditions. It’s something that you don’t have a lot of choice over.

An identity by contrast may be chosen, or it is a choice to make a label one’s own. It is a way to connect with other people in a community. There are also some that I find are kind of in the middle- as in “I identify as X, but it’s easier to access community and explain things if I use label Y”

My non-Pagan partner, though he has generally supported me in my path, has also challenged me. At one point, he sat down and had a talk with me. The Pagan community hasn't been supporting you emotionally, socially or spiritually- in fact dealing with Pagans just makes you crazier! You're not really practicing the religion. If it can help you be a better person, help bring you hope and inspiration, and connect you with a supportive and healthy community then, great. I'd totally support you in that. But if it's not, then what are you searching for? He was right. While all kinds of lofty ideals that other Pagans dedicate themselves to- devotionalism, social justice and so forth are well and good, to begin with at least, I needed to base my practice on self-care, on simply getting myself in a healthy and steady place.

When I first became interested in Paganism, one of the things that drew me in was the idea of women's spirituality and bringing the unique experiences of being a woman (often left out of Christianity and Judaism) into my path. As I further explored though, many of the concepts mainstream feminism focused on, like how to juggle career and motherhood, didn't seem to resonate with me. The way I think, and how I communicate is shaped through my perspective as an autistic woman. Along with the growing, mostly online neurodiversity community, I came to see autism not as a set of deficits, but as a different way of thinking and being. I found further inspiration in the GLBT community, as I saw folks like P. Sufenas Virius Lupus honor queer ancestors, heroes and deities. As a bisexual, I drew on that heritage, while also looking to eccentric inventors, artists and mystics throughout history and disabled gods like Hephaestus. I felt a calling to share this understanding of disability as a part of human experience, rather than something to only be pitied, "fixed" or medicalized.