
Jesus's pronouns are They, Them, and Their.
So, at least, says the Episcopal Conference of Bishops (ECB), at their recent annual meeting in Minneapolis.
“The Church is an institution of radical inclusivity,” said Bishop River Banks, presiding bishop of the American Episcopal Church. “Did Jesus come to save only those assigned male at birth? No! They came to save persons of all genders. If Jesus were alive today—and I believe that they are—their pronouns would be They, Them, and Their.”
"Be sure to get the capitals Ts on those pronouns," they added.
In a controversial decision, an overwhelming majority of acting bishops also voted to revise the liturgies of the Episcopal Church to reflect this new understanding and—even more controversially—to revise the Biblical text accordingly.
“Our understanding of Scripture, like that of the Constitution, is an evolving understanding,” said Banks. “We're not tampering with Scripture, as some have accused,” they added, “we're making it true to its own values.”
“'Radical inclusivity,' ha!” said dissenting Bishop Jack Whymer of Baltimore. “I'm out of here, and I'm taking my congregation with me.”
Prospects of yet another exodus from the Church's ranks do not worry Bishop Banks.