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Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in satire
NASA Confirms Gift of Moon Rock to Minneapolis Pagan Temple

AP: Houston

NASA confirmed today that the US space agency has agreed to donate one of its Moon rocks to a pagan temple in Minneapolis.

"To some, these rocks hold profound spiritual, as well as scientific, significance," said a NASA representative who spoke on condition of anonymity. "Moon worship is one of humanity's oldest religions, and we are proud to make this gift."

Founded in 1980, the Temple of the Moon, the designated recipient of the Moon rock, is the oldest continuously-operating pagan temple in the Twin Cities area, commonly known as "Paganistan" because of its large pagan population.

According to Steven Posch, senior priest at the temple, "Without the Moon's influence on Earth's tides, life literally would not exist on this planet. Small wonder that our ancestors revered the Moon, as we still do today. Now this relic of our goddess can be properly reverenced, as it so richly deserves."

The rock in question, a brescia from the Mare Fecundatatis, was gathered during the Apollo 13 expedition to the Moon in 1970.

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Recent Comments - Show all comments
  • Steven Posch
    Steven Posch says #
    Thanks, DD, I agree. I sent a link both to NASA and to Senator Franken. Who knows?
  • Dragon Dancer
    Dragon Dancer says #
    Rootin' for ya!
  • Dragon Dancer
    Dragon Dancer says #
    HAHA is it sad that I could totally believe this as real? Well, sad about the protests and Rump's tweet. It'd be awesome if your

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
13 o' Clock

 Thirteenth Night,

when time runs backwards,

and the world whirls giddily widdershins.

Happy Feast of Fools!

 

Htrae eht nopu tuo deruop si evol ym dna,

Gnivil lla fo Rehtom eht ma I, dloheb rof,

ecifircas ni thgua dnamed I od ron.

Erofeb enog evah ohw esoht htiw noinuer dna,

modeerf, ecaep, htaed dnoyeb dna;

lanrete tirips eht fo egdelwonk evig I, htrae nopu....

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President Elect Appoints Obscure Blogger as Liaison to Pagan Community

AP: New York

The transition team of president elect Ronald Rump announced today the appointment of obscure PaganSquare blogger Steven Posch as the administration's future liaison with the pagan community.

“Sure, he's a nobody from nowhere that nobody listens to,” said an aide, who spoke on condition of anonymity. “For an insignificant bunch of losers like the pagans, who cares?”

Critics faulted the choice as unrepresentative.

“Darling, Posch doesn't speak for anyone but himself, and that's on a good day,” said Glyph And/Or of Witches Against Negativity and Discrimination (WAND), adding: “He's so far out of the pagan mainstream that his hooves aren't even wet.”

Questioned about his choice, president elect Rump said: “It's so unfair. You don't even know what you're talking about. You're stupid, stupid.

“And you're ugly, too.

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Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Message Found on a Cell Phone

Hey Anita, it's Steven.

I can't remember whether or not there's reception down where you guys are camped. I know that Iacchus has a signal up top at the Big House, so presumably you'll get this sooner or later.

As you'll recall, my original plan was to get to the festival tomorrow—Wednesday—but I'm afraid there have been a few, ah, developments around here.

In fact, you're not going to believe this, but at the moment my house is surrounded by a mob of irate villagers, complete with pitchforks and torches.

Seriously, I am not making this up. You may even be able to hear them in the background. [Muffled shouting.] Like you say, life imitating art.

Gods, with all the kids around here, you'd think they could spare one or two every now and then. I mean, a guy's got to eat, right?

But no.

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Children's Song Preserves Early American Hymn to Goddess of Witches, Says Academic

AP: Boston

Was the common American children's song She'll Be Comin' Round the Mountain originally a hymn to the Moon Goddess of the Witches?

A new study by historian and ethnomusicologist Stefano Pozzo, current chair of ethnomusicology at Massachusetts' prestigious Miskatonic University, suggests that this may indeed be the case.

“It's one of the great mysteries of American paidomusicology [the study of children's music],” says Pozzo. “Who is this mysterious and powerful female driving six white horses? I think that we can now say confidently that we know exactly who she is.”

In the current issue of Ethnomusicology Today, Pozzo examines the earliest surviving texts of the song to present his case.

She'll be coming' round the mountain when she comes,” he writes, “Could one ask for a clearer image of moonrise?”

According to Pozzo, when 17th century British witches fled to the New World to escape religious persecution, they brought their immemorial devotion to the Moon along with them.

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Recent Comments - Show all comments
  • K
    K says #
    I wonder if they have an original copy of this song in the Orne Library?
  • Althea
    Althea says #
    Miskatonic University, huh?
  • Steven Posch
    Steven Posch says #
    Wikipedia has "red" pajamas, but I like "silk" much better. And sleeping with Grandma fits right in: it's funny and mythic both.
  • Carol P. Christ
    Carol P. Christ says #
    I've heard red pyjamas too. The added line with sleep with grandma is "move over." With chicken n dumplins it's "yum yum." etc.
  • Carol P. Christ
    Carol P. Christ says #
    Oh and the Mountain Mother is one of the most common images of the Goddess in places where there are visible mountains.

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Right to Gay Life

Human fetus (male), 12 weeks

Already fantasizing about other male fetuses

 

Queerness begins at the moment of conception.

 

Support the right to love.

 

Happy Pride!

Last modified on
Recent comment in this post - Show all comments
  • Steven Posch
    Steven Posch says #
    They say that the day they discover the "gay gene" is the day pro-lifers start voting pro-choice.

Posted by on in Culture Blogs
Make Paganism Great Again

Let's make Paganism great again!

Paganism used to be great. Paganism used to be the greatest religion in the world. The greatest!

And look at us now. A bunch of scared little wussies hiding behind fake names.

Scared! When we used to be great. Great!

What happened? Do you wanna know what happened? Well, I'll tell you what happened.

Cowans.

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