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Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in relationships

Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs
Lover Meets Beloved

Step into the place of the lover, and the beloved will turn up. The Lover is here for you, has been here all along. Step into the place of the Beloved and sense Earth from this position. Gaia. She's here. She's more than ready to be your Lover. Open up to what starts happening in your life- today- as you step into this. Feel your cells responding. Feel your energy. So much wonder, magic and love right here, right now!

It becomes easier when you allow yourself to be the Beloved of Gaia first. You don't need to make the first move. Gaia is inviting you through every tree, every bird song, every flower. Will you stop and see? Allow your breath to quicken and your heart to miss a beat? Step into the place of the lover, and the beloved will turn up.

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Passion!

A recipe for more passion- and who doesn't want that?

First, remember what NOT to do: don't go looking for passion, or pumping yourself up with lots of stimuli. Why? because they're slow killers. They numb you. Go the other way: become more sensitive to what is. What is here now? 

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Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs
Lover and Beloved

Step into the place of the Beloved. The Lover will come immediately. The great Gaia is always there, right under your feet. She brings this quality of Lover and Beloved into the connection that's happening right now. As soon as you stop denying that, stop taking your awareness away from it, this love bursts to the surface. Allow it in your body, in your dance. Feel it spreading into all your other relationships. Love is happening right here, right now. 

Too often we waste our time- and love- in the delusion it isn't there. AS if we need to search it. This is only possible because we are so estranged from Earth. As soon as we come back to Her, we experience Her infinite Love. Allow yourself to step into the dance and become Her Beloved.

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  • Thesseli
    Thesseli says #
    Beautiful.

Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs
On The Edge of Divine Emergence

Come present in this moment. The edge of sacred emergence is right here, right here now. It’s present in anything you do. Find the edge by fully becoming present. Include whatever there is. Feel you are always, always being met. Maybe not by everyone in the way you would wish. But who’s always there, and always meeting , is earth. And space. Will you be the one who disappoints them? Or will you show up fully? If so, from this connection energy will start to shine. It will invite others to become more present too. Start moving from this connection, from this energy. It’s a place where you don’t know if the movement started in you or in the other. That’s emergence happening. 

 

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Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs
Let's Become Intimate

 

Breathe. Feel the earth beneath you. Sense her sensing you. Earth is alive, and very present to you and your connection.

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Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs

b2ap3_thumbnail_union-0.pngWhat about men?

That's the question people often ask me as I'm praising women's bellies as sacred, not shameful. Praising our body's center as home to the soul-power kin to the magnificent Source Energy creating, sustaining, and renewing the world.

What about men? Don't they have soul-power too?

"What about men?" is also the title of a chapter my editor chose not to include in The Woman's Belly Book, for whatever reason. You can read the full text of that chapter here.

The chapter's major point: As a man enters into his own wholeness, integrating feminine and masculine polarities,

he begins to perceive a woman as a person, informed by her own purpose. His need to control her diminishes. He becomes more capable of entering into a relationship of mutual respect.

As men increasingly live and breathe from center, they prepare themselves to enter into the egalitarian relationships many women desire, and which we deserve. Truly loving relationships can develop as the partners each live from their inner source of being and support each other in returning to their core wisdom, again and again. In this way the relationship takes its strength from the shared center that emerges in the partners' midst.

As men and women support each other in coming home to ourselves, we can engender a more peaceful, just, and sustainable way of being human together on this planet.

Loving relationships? There's a story, origin said to be circa 1450, that — by my lights — holds the key to loving relationships between women and men.

I came across this story as I was preparing The Woman's Belly Book and its companion, the Rite For Reconsecrating Our Womanhood. As part of my research, I delved into Maureen Murdock's book, The Heroine's Journey.

Murdock tells the story of Lady Ragnell and Sir Gawain. The story is part and parcel of Arthurian legend; it relates to other tales of transformation as well.

You can read the original in Middle English here and adaptations into modern English here and hereIn brief, the story demonstrates just what restores women's beauty and balance: Men perceiving women as persons, informed by our own purpose. Men recognizing, respecting, and supporting our autonomy, our sovereignty.

Respecting our sovereignty? A man by the name of Padma Aon Prakasha copied the text of my "What About Men?" chapter into his own book — without ever asking my permission. In his "note to the reader" he asserts his entitlement to appropriate others' words. That's either amusing or appalling, or maybe both.

b2ap3_thumbnail_TBtoast-.jpgBut here's something much more interesting, and a thrill: My friend Denise Ostler (a.k.a. Merri Beacon) has of her own accord, without any previous inkling of Lady Ragnell's story, written her own and up-to-date version as part of her Fairytale Medicine series.

Her Goals & Dreams tale begins

Once upon a time, in a tiny kingdom, there dwelt a sweet princess who cared for injured animals. She created a special place in the royal stables where she could tend to her patients. She loved her work, but alas, it was time for her to marry.

The king narrowed her suitors down to three eligible princes. Each prince was invited to dine at the castle and give a speech about why he would be the best match for the princess. On the first night, a very handsome and confident prince stood to address the royal assembly....

The story continues here. Enjoy!

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Celebrating Partnership Not Competition....Women in Relationship

I was reading comments about how Deepak Chopra and the male host of a show dominated over Riane Eisler in an interview, and it brought up these thoughts I'll share as food for thought.

First, I wish I'd seen the interview.  I love Riane and owe her so much!  She's one of my first mentors, having written The Chalice and the Blade andThe Partnership Way, which drew me to this path and I've never left.  I learned about partnership and perpetuate that idea often because of her early teachings. My book launch party on Saturday has a theme of "celebrating partnership" and it's a shame the interview went the way it was described. 

Myself,  I've have worked in several industries where I have had to supervise men.  I'll mention two.  The first was when I was a Convention Coordinator for a large hotel chain in New Orleans.  I actually was responsible for making sure a hotel with more than 10,000 sq ft of meeting space was turned over 3-4 times a day 7 days a week.  Our "crew" was a dozen African American men.  Me, a white woman, received more respect and enjoyed a team camaraderie with these men - more so than the white men in the administrative office.  In fact the other supervisors couldn't understand their loyalty and our team work.  They didn't get it was mutual respect, cooperation, partnership.  Maybe I instinctively treated these African American men better than the white men they usually answered to here in the South and treated them like people.  We developed a sense of pride in our work together and a team spirit.  With the white men you had to hold your ground, stand up to them or some, not all, were more likely to steamroll you, overlook you, demean you.  However, what was the most frustrating was the superior and entitled attitudes of the management (women and men) brought in from Colorado.  They treated all the local management as if we were all stupid - both men and women, even though we had experience running convention hotels and not small boutique hotels like they had previously run.  The Food and Beverage Manager - an older woman - treated me worse than any man in the hotel.  All these years later I still shudder at the emotion - the tears - that woman provoked in me!

In California I manage property where I have to supervise a lot of white men and men of other cultures as well, a few of which would probably rather have me barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and despise having to take orders from a woman.  I find again you have to stand up, hold your own, speak up.  The rules of etiquette I learned in the South when I was growing up - be nice, don't make waves, defer, conform, well, they just don't get the job done.  Sure I sometimes get called a bitch or a ball buster behind my back.  Once to my face a Telephone Company employee screwing up on the job told me I needed "a good  f--k" and maybe then I would shut up - translation: not tell him to do a better job.  (Interestingly the phone company send out a representative to make a personal apology to me.)  

Of course I get tired of the struggle.  Always having to be assertive to be able to do your job effectively - because the buck stops with me.  Some men still lack awareness of sexism and white male privilege - because its their normal and they benefit from it.  My boss even had to be schooled.  But again, here in CA, unlike in the South, I've experienced just as many women dominators as any men in my life - their methods are just a little more insidious.  So while I certainly am aware of male privilege, patriarchy, domination - let's not kid ourselves that men are the only ones doing it.  Both genders participate.  Women have learned well from their male oppressors and engage in what I call patriarchy in a skirt.  If I had to tally it up, I've had to endure more bad women than men. 

I've read how feminist, Phyllis Chesler, (Woman's Inhumanity to Woman) got a lot of heat for bringing this up - I have her in my upcoming anthology, Voices of the Sacred Feminine: Conversation to ReShape Our World, and I've interviewed her on my radio show, Voices of the Sacred Feminine Radio on Blog Talk.  I sincerely hope I don't get flack for saying this.  I won't engage if it happens.  I've got too much to do.   But we have to face the elephant in the living room if we women are going to lead the charge to change the world.  We have to figure out how to stop being jealous, petty, competitive and put our collective energy into dissolving the patriarchy.  We need to put our personal slights aside and stand in solidarity and partnership.  We have empower one another - be that lobster climbing out of the pot that turns around and helps the others out rather than be the one pulling the escapee back down into the boiling water.  And women have to take the mantle of leadership and be assertive and not expect it to be handed to us. 

Yes, the answer is partnership.  It's mutual respect.  It's fairness.  It's justice.  It's not competition, sexism, classism  or racism.   Among women and men.  We have to try to empower one another as women and not have a scarcity attitude there's only so many pieces of pie so we keep fighting for the scraps among ourselves.  I know I'm probably being politically incorrect here, but seems important to say.  My Sekhmet heart demands it.

Love to you all,
Karen Tate      

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