They speak to me at times, the ones behind the veil.  I can hear them and sense them, but I cannot always see them.  Other times I can see them, but cannot hear what they are saying. Its frustrating to have this happen, so see things that you cannot explain to people around you.  It's even harder to know that there is something that they are trying to tell me but I cannot make sense of it.

At one time it was easier, before kids, before the business of life.  Now the tide is changing and life is slowing a bit - at least for me in some ways - and they are coming back, talking. 

It started with a boy that died, he was in my son's grade.  It hit the community hard.  He had a heart condition, and was at baseball practice, and he was a distant relative.  I'm not sure why he hit my heart so hard.  I never met his parents - as far as I can remember.  But it hit, and he has talked to me, made me sense things again.  I have gone to his parents a couple times, waiting until we are alone, and shared some of what I feel with them.  My nerves were on edge, it's not easy opening yourself up in this manner to people around here, people who are very Bible oriented.  I worry about what it would do to my kids' reputation, what it will to do our jobs.  I love this small town, yet fear it all the same.

They were welcoming, accepting, and encouraging of more information when it comes to me.  There was a sigh of relief. 

So now I pass houses and I hear whispers, feel things, and sense things.  Mostly I try to block it out, some is disturbing and some is sad.  I passed their house the other night and sensed fire, an accelerant.  I know how painful the loss of their only son has been to them, it breaks my heart to feel it when I'm around them or near them.  I know they wish to be with him, but they also know that they are to go when their time has come.  Yet there are days that I feel that they are on that edge...I said a prayer, asking for help, asking that they would not think to burn their house, asking that there would not be any accidents. 

A few minutes later I checked Facebook, she had posted about their dog getting ahold of a lighter and eating it.  I posted back, telling her of the feeling I had just had.  She told me that it was amazing what I could feel.  The next day though, she posted a picture of a helicopter landing across the street from her house, they were life-flighting a man to a hospital, he had caught on fire in his yard.  This sent chills through me, her too.

I have decided to listen more, to learn more, to meditate more, in hopes to gain more clarity.  I ordered a set of moonstone runestones.  I have read tarot for years and am comfortable with them.  I just have a hard time carrying them with me everywhere.  I already have a bag of stones that I carry everywhere with me.  They are various stones that I've had for nearly 30 years.  Funny how attached you get to these things.

I have taken my runestones into my stone circle, laid them out in the sun and cleared them.  I have sat with them there, picking each one up and meditating on it.  They are now in my purse next to my other stone bag, and now and again, I reach in and pull a rune out.  I study it, the meaning, it's feel, it's vibration.  I'm not sure if they will help me hear behind the veil, but it is worth a try.