What better day of the month to release that which no longer serves me, that which harms me and holds me back, than the night before the new moon?

I feel like I've been carrying the weight of the grieving world on my shoulders for the last few weeks.  Perhaps for the last few months.  And I've come very close to my breaking point.

Which is a bit silly, since I know better.  I know the importance of taking care of myself and keeping my tank full.  I know how to shift my mood, how to re-frame stressful crap into tools of healing and growth.

Even knowing all that, it's still so easy to fall back into the self-sabotaging habits of younger years.

I'm tired of feeling drained and irritable and sad and anxious about the things that other people are saying and doing.  I'm tired of being stuck in that destructive circular thinking pattern, helpless and hopeless thoughts distracting me from the joys and love in my life, and from the actions I can take to improve my life, and my bit of the world.

I'm tired of being angry with people who are never going to apologize, never going to see their actions from my perspective.

I'm ready to purge myself of the toxins that have been building inside me.  I'm ready to release the pent-up stress.  I'm ready the let go of the past and thus make space for a better present and future.

There's lots of ways to do it, and I'm doing every one that calls to me.

For the mental level, I am performing what I call a "brain dump."  I am using actual pen and paper to write out every unpleasant, unhelpful thought in my head on as many pages of paper as it takes until I feel done.  Then I scribble CANCEL over each page.  Then I rip each page of nastiness into little pieces, gleefully cackling while lighting them on fire and watching them writhe into pale gray ash.  When the iron cauldron is cool, I'll dump the ashes into my toilet and flush that crap right out of my life.

For the emotional level, I know I need my feelings heard and recognized before I can really let them go.  I will find a friend to "hold space" for me.  Holding space means listening and hearing what I say without judging it, trying to fix me, or trying to figure out what they should say next.  All they need to say is, "I hear you."  They could also tell me how they have felt in similar situations, as long as they don't try to turn it into a contest of who is the most stressed or whose life sucks worst.  They could say that they hear my pain and my stress and they can't even imagine having to go through whatever I just said, or they could just tell me they love me and give me a nice warm hug.  If I can't find a friend to hold space for me either in person or over the phone, I can hold space for myself by writing myself a letter with all my complaints, shifting my mood into loving patience, then reply back to myself the way I would like a friend to.

For the physical level, I am drinking lots of detoxing tea, taking a hot shower with my homemade salt scrub, and burning off the stress with dancing or a long walk.

For the spiritual level, I am turning this releasing into a ritual.  I am talking to my spirit guides, angels, patron deities, at the beginning praying to Creator for help releasing. At the very end a prayer of gratitude for every little thing I can think to be thankful for in my life, and for the things that are coming that I don't know about yet.  I am burning sage and lighting candles, pulling out my favorite card decks, singing my favorite songs and chants, and meditating myself into that blissful sensation of oneness.

And if I feel moved to, I'll do it all again tomorrow night.  Or maybe by tomorrow night I'll be ready to call in some new beginnings.

I'd love more tools to add to my "releasing" toolbox.  Please let me know your favorite ways to release that which no longer serves you in the comments below.