Paganistan: Notes from the Secret Commonwealth
In Which One Midwest Man-in-Black Confers, Converses & Otherwise Hob-Nobs with his Fellow Hob-Men (& -Women) Concerning the Sundry Ways of the Famed but Ill-Starred Tribe of Witches.
The Craft's Last, Best-Kept Secret
Has anybody else noticed that there's nary a vegetable bouillon cube to be found at the stores?
I know, I know. Vegetable bouillon cubes are outré, taboo to serious cooks. Well, la-dee-da.
Me, I like them. They're quick, they're easy and, when you cook vegetarian, tossing one in can add that extra layer of base flavor that makes the difference between good and really good.
But—dammit—there aren't any to be had.
I ran out just before Thanksgiving. Since then, I've looked for more every single time that I've been at the store.
Ix-nay.
Then I discovered the reason why.
You know all those baby-eating cannibals that the Q-Anon election-deniers are so worried about?
Well: 12 out of the 13 top recipes for enfant rôti call for vegetable bouillon. As any witch can tell you, the delicate flavor of the vegetable broth perfectly compliments that of tender young flesh.
So sh*t, folks, the Craft's Last, Best-Kept Secret is out.
Guess we'll just have to start using chicken bouillon instead.
"Everything they say we are, we are."
Sparky T. Rabbit
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