Paganistan: Notes from the Secret Commonwealth

In Which One Midwest Man-in-Black Confers, Converses & Otherwise Hob-Nobs with his Fellow Hob-Men (& -Women) Concerning the Sundry Ways of the Famed but Ill-Starred Tribe of Witches.

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Ask Boss Warlock: Can Witches Sing 'Ding Dong the Witch is Dead'?



Dear Boss Warlock:

When I heard about the conviction of killer cop Derek Chauvin, I wanted to dance in the streets and sing “Ding Dong the Witch Is Dead.” As a triumph song, it's hard to beat.

But now I'm wondering: is it OK for witches to sing that song?

Munchkinning in Madison


Dear MM:

My friend, you're golden to go, and here's why:

By virtue of the fact that we're insane enough to call ourselves witches, anything with the word “witch” on it ipso facto (as Professor Marvel would say) automatically belongs to us.

So: when it comes to “Ding Dong,” feel free to dance, sing, and ring the bells out. It's our song, and we'll sing if we want to.

To be sure, I would recommend a certain amount of situational editing. Boss Warlock can fondly recall hearing the dulcet strains of “Ding Dong the Nazz Is Dead” ("Which old nazz? the nazzty nazz!") on the streets of Paganistan after the unlamented demise of the late Jerry Falwell,



not to mention the Muzzie version after Bin Laden's.

Myself, I'm looking forward to “Ding Dong, the Mitch Is Dead,” and let us all say: Gods speed the day.

So get those ruby slippers on, kids. Life is full of losses; let's take our triumphs while we may.

Boss Warlock



Got a question?

Boss Warlock has an answer.

Write him c/o the Paganistan Blog.



With special thanks

to RG








Last modified on
Tagged in: Wizard of Oz
Poet, scholar and storyteller Steven Posch was raised in the hardwood forests of western Pennsylvania by white-tailed deer. (That's the story, anyway.) He emigrated to Paganistan in 1979 and by sheer dint of personality has become one of Lake Country's foremost men-in-black. He is current keeper of the Minnesota Ooser.


  • Jamie
    Jamie Wednesday, 21 April 2021

    Mr. Posch,

    One major thing I can't forgive Falwell for, is his response to 9/11.

    We Pagans were the first people he blamed.

    "You helped this happen", because apparently his One True God stopped protecting America on account of LGBT rights and Pagan religious freedom...and women getting the vote. WTF.

    He tried to walk it back shortly afterwards, because it exposed the true mindset of the Dominionists.

    My worst fear is not a thermonuclear holy war between Christianity and Islam. It's someone like Falwell in the White House, sitting across a table from someone like Bin Laden...and realizing just how much they actually have in common. I'm sure the mass murders would be committed in a loving, Christ-like way.

    Goodbye religious freedom, everywhere, once that happens. Either I become an outlaw, or book my f*cking ticket to Mars.

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