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I recently posted one of Danielle LaPorte's Truthbombs on my Facebook page:
This sparked a discussion of what it means to make a vow, to break a vow, and to hide behind a vow, a discussion that got me thinking about my first marriage and divorce.
When February has been Harsh
It's just one foot in front of the other.
It's just one moment,
then another, then another-
Till the footfalls mark a footpath
and the breathing is a testament.
~Amoret
It's funny how time flies and yet remains standing still. I blink, and we are in the middle of February. I blink again, and the world outside is still covered in ice and deep, deep snow.
The winter, thus far, has been educational.
I've been feeling weird about getting so sick right at the New Year. This time was "supposed" to be my time to fully celebrate my transition into working full-time for myself. I keep fighting the idea that, as I'm recovering, I should be doing more - "Yeah, I'm no longer contagious, running a fever every day, lost in a pile of tissues - I should definitely be up and running around, Doing My Work!" In truth, I'm still very congested, still rocking an intense phlegmy chest cough that would make a Grandpa proud, and rocking a sweet sinus headache. It is no wonder that I am exhausted by doing small things.
Right now, today, my Work is resting until I am fully well. I keep reminding myself of the Fourth Agreement, Always Do Your Best - and my best right now is to take my medications, and do some laundry, and knit a bit, and nap a bit, and watch a movie here and there. As Danielle LaPorte says, "The journey has to feel the way you want the destination to feel."
...
I had planned to write this post a few days ago, as a Start The New Year Off Right sort of post...but then I got the flu, and today is the first day I am able to sit upright and focus my eyes on a computer screen for more than few moments, so here we go!
I don't really do New Year resolutions, but I do give each year an Official Title, as a way of calling specific magic into my life for that year. 2013, for instance, was the Year of Accepting All Gifts. (Let me tell you, that called forth a wild ride!)
...This poem was written years ago, when a Capricorn was a large part of my life. Now, I have a new Capricorn housemate; this time, it is for you, my dear Celeste.
Capricorn
...Yggdrasil
Huginn and Muninn, the ravens return,
...
Who is this flower above me,
And what is the work of this god?
I would know myself in all my parts.
~ Feri Flower Prayer
My work of late has been focused around surrender, specifically, surrendering to the moment and surrendering to the Gods. And first and foremost, I have to surrender to my Self, specifically, to my Godself.*
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