During this month of Light returning (Imbolc) and love igniting (Valentine's celebrations) I collaborated with a man who worships and praises the Divine Feminine expression of the one Source. 

 

The re-emergence of the Goddess has challenged everybody to question the patriarchal realm that has been dominating us for too long. With the rise of the Goddess comes a new relationship with the Divine, as well as Father God that we connect to in the Heavenly realms we have begun to become reacquainted with the Mother Goddess of the Earthly world that we are in.

 

Although it has seemed as though it is women who predominantly worship and honour the Goddess, she is not a 'God' for women. Just as the patriarchy  harms both women and men, the Goddess is an expression of Source that feeds both women and men.

 

Once I began to know the Feminine aspects of the Creator, She became such a significant part of my life that I couldn't imagine having a long term relationship with a man that couldn't honour that side of Source. I also couldn't imagine raising children who didn't know Her face and presence. I didn't believe that I could be led to a strong, masculine man who would honour Goddess, nor one that would join me in raising Goddess conscious children. The man I was dating when I began my Priestess path would vehemently argue "why does it have to be so much about She and Her? God isn't a woman you know." I would counter, "I know, God also isn't a man, so why not use Her for a few hundred years since we've all gotten to know the Him side so well?" I could feel him bristle, he felt threatened and upset and there was nothing I could do. Shortly thereafter we parted ways.

 

My employer at the time was only too happy to set me up on a blind date with a wealthy, successful man who was ready to settle down and have children. I was happy to go on a date, my last relationship had gotten quite tedious, and I was looking to have children in the nearish future. When I met up with this man I didn't feel the spark, but I decided to explore it. He showed interest in my spirituality, the Goddess Gatherings I attended and the Priestess training I was doing.  A part of me felt vulnerable about revealing my sacred inner world to a person I had just met, but his enthusiasm made me ignore my reservations. After we parted ways I pondered how I would politely decline a future date, as I knew he wasn't for me. I also pondered how I would let my employer know that her blind date hadn't created a future marriage. I arrived at work and my boss pulled me aside.

 

"Candise, Peter (let's call him Peter) said that you seemed more into the Goddess than you were into having a family."

 

I'm going to pause here a moment to share that I wish I could have put a halt to this insulting conversation then and there, but I was shocked, humiliated and dumbfounded.

 

In a condescending voice my employer went on to suggest that I ease people into my lifestyle and not mention it on a first date. That night on the bus ride home I cried, devastated that I had shared about my sacred journey with this man. I felt humiliated to be discussed as though I were a piece of property and then shamed for who I am. I was desolate, certain that that I would never find a man who would honour my path, let alone join me on it.

 

Fast forward two months later and I was flying to New York, a whirlwind of a city where I met and instantly fell in love with my husband. As we sat at a busy diner the night we met he asked me similar questions to the blind date guy, except this time I felt at home and safe. I felt as though all of my life was being coated in pink gossamer. I just fell into a conversation about who and what I was, and he was enraptured. He compared me to his psychic mother and genuinely admired my work. Months later as we dated and then moved in together he would play guitar and lead "We all come from the Goddess..." in circles that I led. He would drop me off at Priestess circles and Goddess Gatherings and join me for events where men were welcomed. 

When our daughter was born I wanted to choose one name to call Source. I wanted Goddess, he preferred Divine Mother. Who was I to argue? I had my sexy, Goddess loving man and was raising my daughter with two parents who honoured Her presence. It was everything a gal could ask for.

Except that I felt called to more. I wanted other men to know how to honour Her, why to honour Her and where She fit into their lives. I contemplated creating outlines for men's ceremonies,yet I kept getting a stop signal from Spirit. I felt I was being told that this work wasn't to come through me, it was to come through a man. 

 

Two months ago after posting my Moon Medicine article for Sage Woman Blogs I received an email from a man, thanking me and describing his personal Moon rituals with the Goddess. 

 

I had found what I had been looking for, a man who worked with other men to honour the Goddess. 

This felt joyful to me because I need to know that men are safe and beautiful creatures, reflections of the Divine Masculine. The more men that break down those walls the brighter the hope for a true existence of harmony and balance. The Divine Masculine is re~awakening and a part of this re~awakening is his honour and worship of the Divine Feminine. 

 

The man who emailed me is called Waterfall Sunfeather. Waterfall Sunfeather is an eclectic Pagan, Witch, and a student of Woolston-Steen Theological Seminary. He is a father, a husband, a writer, and is finding enlightenment on Hatteras Island, North Carolina.

 

We began corresponding and I was grateful and honoured when he agreed to work with me on an article introducing women and men to a rarely discussed side of Goddess worship, the males side. 

Below I share some portions of our correspondence: 

 

Candise: "Why do you, as a man feel it is important to connect to the Feminine aspect of Divinity?"

 

Waterfall: "I believe men need to connect more with the Feminine aspect in order to get in touch with their feelings, intuition, creativity, and inner beauty. Most men lead their lives as half people. Men are encouraged to be "masculine" by society's standards. Those standards include being physically strong, logical, and honest. Unfortunately, they also tend to prohibit sensitivity and emotion. By connecting to the Feminine, we are also able to better connect with the other half of society and begin to empathize with women and understand what they go through on a daily basis. It is not until we begin to fix the inequality within ourselves that we can begin to fix the inequality in society."

 

Candise:

"When did the Divine Feminine begin to call to you?"

 

Waterfall: 

"When I was about 14, I began having dreams of a dark Goddess. She appeared in all black with black hair. I didn't know what to make of the dreams, but I knew enough to learn from them. I still have a place for this aspect. I have since learned to call her Morrigan and have made an altar on the western wall of my bedroom for her. She still teaches me a great deal. Though I usually work with Deity in meditation, she still occasionally appears in dreams." He went on to further expand on his connection to the Divine Feminine in Her deity forms and how She has worked with him in meditation, he told me,  "When I was visiting Pennsylvania, my wife and I met up with a shaman who practices up there. She helped me to connect with Butterfly. I was told that I needed to teach beauty. When I asked the Butterfly in the meditation if I was to teach men or women, I was told "we are all one." 

 

Candise: "In your spiritual community do you meet many other men that honour the Divine Feminine?"

 

Waterfall: "Yes! I am fortunate enough to be going to a school where I am surrounded by other males who connect to the Goddess. I have a wonderful male professor who opens class with a prayer to Goddess. The first time I attended one of his classes and heard him do it, something inside just said, "I'm in the right place." I just learned of a fellow male classmate who is a follower of Sekhmet, a powerful Egyptian goddess." *

 

Candise: "Are there any prejudice towards men in the spiritual circles you have participated in?" I asked him.

 

Waterfall: "Absolutely, there is. I have received everything from gratitude to open hostility, just for being a male involved in Paganism and Witchcraft. I have had so many problems being heard or accepted. I have had ideas fall on deaf ears, simply because of my gender. And I have been stereotyped as only connecting to the Masculine. I think there are a lot of women in the Craft, seeking healing, which is wonderful. I also think that a few of those women are confusing the men who have caused them pain with the men who are also seeking healing or are even there to help. That is most unfortunate. I think men and women have both been hurt by our patriarchal society and that we need to heal, together. "

           Candise:

 "What tips would you offer a man looking to begin to cultivate his relationship with the Divine Feminine?"

 

Waterfall: "Pray and meditate. I think of prayer as the act of asking or talking to Deity. Meditation is the act of listening. If for some reason, a person cannot do meditation, ask for a sign. That sign could be a dream, an image, or a phone call from a friend. Just be open to the messages from the Goddess. She moves in mysterious ways. Just be open."

 

Candise: "How has worshipping the Feminine face of Source impacted your masculinity, your relationship to self as a man?"

Waterfall: "It has led me to start differentiating between the two ideas of masculinity. There is society's idea of masculinity, which is all macho and testosterone. Many discussions about the subject have led me to spell it "maskulinity." Society's idea of masculinity is a man without feeling and all about impressing people. It's living up to impossible standards. Then, there is my definition of masculinity which is logic, will power, and inner strength. I try to live my life as a balanced individual, who relies on both logic and intuition, will power and compassion, and finds inner strength and inner beauty. This is what I find and learn though the Goddess. "

 

What a vision for our world. This is the new masculine who seeks to know Goddess and his inner feminine self.  Waterfall's experiences on the spiritual journey mirror my own, I have seen that it is not so much about being female or male, worshiping the Goddess face or God face of Divinity. It is about knowing the whole. Knowing the whole of myself and the whole of Source energy as It expresses Itself in this realm.

 

As I walk into this upcoming season of Light, I am full of hope and renewal. My personal hibernation season unearthed deeper parts of myself that were ready to evolve, elevate and open. As I draw closer to Her presence I find Her in all areas of life, internally and externally, with my sisters and now with my brothers. I am ready to meet a new reality, one in which I dance with the Goddess and look for Her in all people. I walk into this season with a new vision of men and their divine relationship to Goddess, a relationship that we all share with Her.

 

I will leave you with a Moon ritual that Josh has created for men to use during the dark moon. While women connect to the dark moon to perform their Moon Medicine there is a ritual that men can use to connect to this magic as well. Waterfall has said about this ritual : "This has really helped me connect with the women in my life. I would easily consider this one of the most important things in my practice." I hope it will do the same for you

 

~ Light a candle for Hekate and walk with a cauldron to the beach or nearest body of water after dark.

 

~ Connect to the starlight above, if there are no street lights a flashlight might come in handy, but when available follow the light of the stars above.

 

~ During the walk, try not to think about anything, focusing on how you've changed over the last month.

 

~When you arrive at the body of water, meditate and connect to the elements of the water and earth below you, begin to merge with the dark moon above.

 

~ Focus your intention on releasing everything of the last month. Your expectations of the world, your expectations of yourself, your lessons, your intentions, your everything. This is your life and your magic, and you are letting it all go.

 

~ Release into the water.

 

~ On the way back, ground and relax

 

Grace Be With You,

Priestess of Grace,

Candise Soaring Butterfly

 

and

 

Waterfall Sunfeather

 

 

 

 

 

 

*Woolston-Steen Theological Seminary, professor's Alfred Willowhawk.

 

* to connect to Waterfall Sunfeather you can reach him at : waterfallsunfeather@gmail.com

 

*edited by : Michele Murphy https://ca.linkedin.com/in/murphymkm