May Day 2014 was the first ritual I attended after Loki started skinriding me almost every day. Because he could be present in my body at any time, I have to be sure that every ritual I go to is a Loki-friendly one put on by Loki-welcoming people. If Loki isn't welcome in main ritual space, and he's in here with me, then I can't enter main ritual space.

It would not make any sense for me to put a lot of time and effort into getting to a ritual if I can't be sure I'll be able to participate in it. Luckily, there was a ritual I could attend right in my local area. 

This ritual was a public May Day ritual being put on by a bookstore. The ritual was generally Wiccan in flavor, but the main part of the ritual was a Maypole dance, which was held in an outdoor area. The Maypole dance is a very old custom, and is suitable for many types of pagans, including heathen reconstructionists. 

At this particular ritual, the ribbons attached to the pole were in two colors, red and white. The red ribbons were for women, symbolizing blood mysteries, and the white ribbons were for men, symbolizing semen. I was unsure which gender I was supposed to be expressing right then. That's an issue that doesn't usually come up in heathen rituals, so I had not thought to decide before the ritual started. In addition to having a male skinrider right then, the other reason I was having trouble deciding is because one of the things that writing Some Say Fire did for me was to reconnect with my childhood self. My childhood dream self had always been male. 

The ritual leader was a friend. She knew I wanted to dance, because dancing is one of my big things, but as various people took the ribbons, I just stood there. The ritual leader solved my dilemma by deciding for me, and handed me a white ribbon. 

The ritual was wonderful. The dancing and singing expressed joy at the return of spring. I was able to participate fully.  Only the ritual leader and I even knew Loki was there.

I continue to both host my own rituals and participate in public rituals and festivals. I just have to take an extra step before deciding whether to participate in a given event, and that is to find out whether it is a Loki-welcoming event.