Paganistan: Notes from the Secret Commonwealth

In Which One Midwest Man-in-Black Confers, Converses & Otherwise Hob-Nobs with his Fellow Hob-Men (& -Women) Concerning the Sundry Ways of the Famed but Ill-Starred Tribe of Witches.

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Boss Warlock's Really Stinky, Burn-Your-Butt, Half-Moon Baby Turnip Kimchi

 

 

If the witch-hunters are to be believed (!), when we're not eating babies at our Sabbats, we're busy relishing food that's half-rotten and stinks instead.

Just goes to show that even witch-hunters can get something right every now and then.

Even the part about the babies.

 

Boss Warlock's Really Stinky Half-Moon Baby Turnip Kimchi

 

1 lb. baby turnips

4½ teaspoons salt

2-3 teaspoons crushed red pepper

10-12 minced scallions

10-12 cloves garlic, minced

1 teaspoon sugar

 

Top and tail turnips. (There's no need to skin them; that's the advantage of using baby turnips.) Cut each turnip in half; slice each half into thin half-moons.

Toss the turnip slices with 3 teaspoons of salt. Turn out into a bowl, cover, and allow to drain overnight.

Next day, drain the turnips—the salt will have drawn a substantial amount of liquid—and rinse well. Mix in the rest of the ingredients, including the remaining 1½ teaspoons of salt, and turn out into a quart jar. (Use one with a plastic lid. Seriously, this stuff will eat its way through metal. No, I am not kidding here.) Add water until the turnips are covered.

Cover the jar loosely, and let it ripen, unrefrigerated, for 6 to 8 days. When it's sour enough to suit you, cover and refrigerate.

 

If you start now, you can have a batch ready by Lúnasa: just the thing to take the gamey edge off that yummy, but oh-so-rich, enfant rôti.

 

 

 

For M.G. and M.S.

With thanks for the turnips

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last modified on
Poet, scholar and storyteller Steven Posch was raised in the hardwood forests of western Pennsylvania by white-tailed deer. (That's the story, anyway.) He emigrated to Paganistan in 1979 and by sheer dint of personality has become one of Lake Country's foremost men-in-black. He is current keeper of the Minnesota Ooser.

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