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Every day, in temples far and wide across Pagandom, offerings are made, and prayers go up, for the well-being of pagan peoples everywhere. The Lore would have it that, indeed, the very well-being of our People depends on these prayers and offerings, and everyone agrees that, once the making of prayers and offerings has begun, it is bad to discontinue them.

So what happens when the priest or priestess goes on vacation?

The TV remote oracle is the most punk rock form of divination possible. You can think of your remote control as a wand, and as  self-described “White Wizard” Thelemite  and bestselling author Lon Milo Duquette says, “TV is a medieval magician’s dream come true—a magic mirror that informs, entertains, and (if we’re not careful,) enchants.” So whether you spend all of your time watching the Syfy Channel or Game of Thrones, or even if you only watch Lord of the Rings and Hobbit reruns you can still wield your magic powers with your remote control.

,The next time you sit down to watch your favorite show, try this:

For about two weeks every May, a dreamy scent drifts throughout my neighborhood. The source is the common lilac (Syringa vulgaris), also known as French lilac. Most of the houses in my area of town are Victorians and the plethora of lilac shrubs are due to a long-standing tradition in North America to plant one by the front door. With spreading roots that tend to go out of bounds, lilacs end up in neighboring yards. Luckily, no one seems to consider this a problem and we all get to enjoy the sweet fragrance. The scent is beloved by so many people that arboretums in a number of states have a special event called Lilac Sunday.

“So, what look are we going for?”

It was a good question. The general planning and walk-through for the Hunt ritual had gone well. Now the Hunters were meeting.

Well, what aesthetic were we after? Plaid and day-glo, no, but likewise loincloths and feathers were out, too. One reads funny, the other reads wannabe, and this is ritual: it needs to be real.

Well, the only pagans that we can honestly be is the pagans for our own time and place.

“Post-industrial primitive,” I said.

Which left most of us in jeans, skin, and face paint.

The Terrestrial Way

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always craved recognition. It’s not a surprise really. I grew up in a situation where the majority of attention I got was negative. I’d get grounded on the drop of a coin, or was told I was a disappointment on a regular basis and no matter what I did, it was never enough. That was the seed for my desire to be recognized.

During the 1955 eruption of Hawai'is Mount Kilauea, a large section of Puna was cut off from the rest of the island by two massive lava-flows. As a safety precaution, the authorities evacuated the entire area.

Three men from a local sugar company chartered a plane to check on canefields in the impacted area. The plane set them down between the two lava-flows. Much to their surprise, they came upon a striking native woman in a red dress, with a great cloud of black hair down her back, sitting at the edge of the cane-field.

“Hi,” said the men.

“Aloha,” said the woman.

“What are you doing here?” they asked.

She smiled. “Just resting here in the shadow of the sugarcane.”

“This area was evacuated two weeks ago,” the men told her. “You're in terrible danger: you're between two lava flows here.”

The woman just smiled.

“What is your name?” they asked her.

“'Ulei,” she said. 'Ulei is a Hawai'ian shrub with small, white, rose-like flowers.

The men offered to take her to safety with them on their plane.

“Oh, I'm not leaving yet,” she said, “At least, not today; I still have work to do here. Perhaps I'll be ready to go next week.”

The men warned the woman that they would have to report her to the authorities, as her presence in the area was illegal. "These laws exist to protect people," they told her.

For the first time, the woman looked displeased.

“I follow my own laws,” she told them.