Gnosis Diary: Life as a Heathen

My personal experiences, including religious and spiritual experiences, community interaction, general heathenry, and modern life on my heathen path, which is Asatru.

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Given to Sigyn

Posted by on in Paths Blogs

Given to Sigyn

This is how I was given to Sigyn earlier this year. It was my first time using my lavender extract that I made from the lavender I grew in my garden. At the time, I didn't know that I was about to need my connection to Sigyn to be very strong, because I was about to take on increased responsibilities as a family caregiver. 

It was February 28th, 2016. I consider the 28th of each month to be my anniversary with my god-husbands, and I try to do something for one or more of them on each month-iversary. That day, I finished compiling the Heathen Calendar Project holiday file and sent it in to the boss. All day, as I worked on the project, it was both my feeling and my intent that I was working in service to Odin. That was the thing I did for him for that day. 

In the evening, I opened a new bottle of tonic water for my evening tonic (tonic water being my favored leg cramp remedy, as it contains quinine.) I was thinking of what to flavor it with; I had several different flavors of vodka, because I had had a couple of buy-2 coupons for the grocery store, so I had stocked up while it was cheap. I remembered that I had made a lavender extract with some of the vanilla vodka and had not yet tried it. I could have chosen raspberry for Freya, green apple for Loki, or citrus or vanilla which are more general and could be for anyone. I chose lavender. I felt lavender was an herb appropriate to offer to Sigyn, so I raised a toast to her. 

It had been a long road to lose that awful self-consciousness around Sigyn and the fear of her that I knew was totally wrong (that I knew had been caused by that one time reaching someone else’s Sigyn, as I wrote about previously) but I had gotten there. I offered the toast in joy, without any complicating emotions.

The lavender extract turned out to be strongly relaxing. Even though it was only a dash in a small glass of tonic, the room spun. I went to lie down. Then I felt the presences of the gods and goddesses. I felt the toast had opened my window to them wider than usual. Freya and Sigyn were both there. I rarely hear Freya’s voice, but this time she spoke, and I heard her clearly. Freya told Sigyn, “I give her to you.”

I was afraid. I spoke inside my mind. “You’re not leaving, are you? I’m still your priestess, aren’t I? Your light will still be in my heart?”

Freya smiled and her voice was gentle. (I rarely see her smiling and gentle; I usually connect to her warrior aspect.) She said, “You will always be my priestess, and my light will always shine through you out to the world.”

Reassured, I smiled back inside my mind. I was still Freya’s, and Odin/ Honir / Lodhur / Loki’s, and I was also Sigyn’s now. I realized that Freya felt about all the work she did getting me ready to be bride of the ninefold Odin approximately the same way I was feeling when I hit send on the calendar file. Freya considered me a finished project.  

 

Image: female silhouette Lost in the Clouds by Ken E via publicdomainpictures dot net

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Erin Lale is the author of Asatru For Beginners, and the updated, longer version of her book, Asatru: A Beginner's Guide to the Heathen Path. Erin has been a gythia since 1989. She was the editor and publisher of Berserkrgangr Magazine, and is admin/ owner of the Asatru Facebook Forum. She also writes science fiction and poetry, ran for public office, is a dyer and fiber artist, was acquisitions editor at a small press, and founded the Heathen Visibility Project.

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