Pagan Music Project: Risky Material From the Forbidden Library
Learn how Classical Music harbors subliminal and not-so subliminal Pagan messages.
Touching the Gods through Music
Recently, someone asked me a question about my music: Do I touch the Gods through my music?
I gave the answer that I channel energy through my music. I create with my music. Thinking about it now, I am realizing just how many ways music is communicative and useful to me in my spirituality, and I think I answered for a question that I interpreted in only a certain way. I thought I was being asked about touching the Gods through a performance, and responded with the experience of the origination of Vivienne in the world premiere of Nightsong. Through the author's words and the composers' (there were two composers) music, I channeled energy to create a character. The reality of Vivienne was "indoubitable."
But then I thought of this blog and the website that I'm not-so-secretly developing. I thought about my unending search for what is Pagan in Classical Music. I thought of the long hours of practice that I've spent and the sorrow and joy that I've experienced trying to learn.
And one thing becomes clear: I resented it. Not for what I learned, but for the way I learned it. Never did I give permission to be put through an ordeal. And yet it was done to me. Never did I give permission to be ridiculed for a wrong answer. And yet it was done to me. Never did I believe for a minute that I would let that get me down.
I don't always touch the Gods. Some deities will come to me, others state that they must be worked towards. The music is the magic that gets me to the crossroads of power from which I journey. It's my chariot or my boat.
The search, discovery, and detailing of Pagan, Occult, and New Age ideas in classical music is what connects me to that energy when I am not performing or singing or working or cleaning or selling random sistra (sp?) to flea-market folk.
Plus, it's REALLY hard to trust resources sometimes. I prefer academically researched Anthropological and Archaeological resources to the spiritual books on magic that are currently published today, and it is that level of scholarship that I put into my Pagan Music Project. I believe that if it is worth doing, it is worth doing as correctly as I can manage. I abhor the word "perfect." Because I am not perfect and never ever will be. It's an insult to me. It carries the implication of being unconnected from its original source and I don't want to disconnect from what makes me who I am.
I really don't know if that answers the question, but it's a response of sorts.
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