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Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in motherhood

Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs
What if I Were a Normal Mom?

A recent household occasion presented an opportunity to implement a natural solution instead of using a chemical-laden product. My daughter Emily is eleven-going-on-20 and upon her happy discovery of my homemade concoction, she sat quietly for a while and then asked, “If you were a normal mom, what would you have done instead?” Huh. If I were a “normal” mom, what would I have done? This question has sat within for a few weeks now and it has led to a good chuckle more than a few times. Emily and I did talk about her question at that moment because I was curious to know what she defined as being a “normal” mom compared to being a mom (perhaps me) who is “not normal”. It generated a lot of laughs between the two of us and offered up great time to connect deeply.

If I had been asked this as an ungrounded new mom years ago, my psyche easily could have taken a backseat on the train toward the villages of Panic and Self-Doubt. I suppose there have been conscious choices which have been made through the years to define myself in her mind as being somewhat “not normal” as she places that language in her mind. Upon inquiry I learned that she sees me laughing. A lot. Singing, playfulness, prayerfulness, and random dance moves are busted out at random times of the day, often early in the morning in the kitchen while I "should be" packing her lunch for school. Dress-up consists of wrapping ourselves with big swatches of colorful fabric and then often these pieces are brought outside on windy, sunny days to watch how they shape-shift in the light and air.

Friendships are deeply cherished and close friends are looked at more as family. Gypsy-family members often stay here at our home to receive the “Love Boot Camp” experience where everyone knows it is ok and even encouraged to bust out their own random dance moves, participate in spontaneous jam sessions, and be offered healing sessions at sometimes late hours of the night if that is what is called for. It's ok to cry here and there is always a set of arms, usually many, which are available for embrace. We hold summersault contests up and down the hall and create ceremonies around the fire out back. We listen to a lot of music; the type depending on our moods, but I’m known in Emily's mind for listening to “hippy” and “spiritual” stuff while she prefers classical, jazz, and talk radio.

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  • Jennifer Mills
    Jennifer Mills says #
    Oh, Paola, thank you. She is quite the wise woman indeed. When she was two, she would ask her father and I to play a game where
  • Paola Suarez
    Paola Suarez says #
    Ha! I love it when they remember in that way. So wonderful!
  • Paola Suarez
    Paola Suarez says #
    We all choose our parents as spirits and I'm sure you provide the right mix of magic and love for your old soul of a daughter. Tha

Posted by on in SageWoman Blogs

I walked down an escalator into the 24th Street BART station in San Francisco's Mission District. I was in a hurry, as I always am in BART. I don't enjoy BART with the same wonder that I felt 23 years ago, when the then-gleaming gray cars of the underground light rail stood for everything my former home of Orange County did not: efficient futurism.

Now BART has become another feature of the city, and it is worn down, besides. It's now simply a well-traveled, still efficient, but sadly familiar semaphore for the agitated haste of the city commuter. I walked rapidly down the moving escalator steps.

I saw people everywhere and the entry gates and the BART musician of the day, and my mind and energy were at least 30 steps ahead. My spirit was already waiting on the platform: everyone moved with practiced, controlled impatience. We were none of us really there: we were really at home or a restaurant or maybe even in the office, although it was late afternoon.

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  • Lizann Bassham
    Lizann Bassham says #
    May we all have the wisdom to stop and notice. Thank you for your words.

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