I have always viewed the Solitary (Solitary By Choice) as one who walks alone on her spiritual path, not one isolated from other Pagans. I have known many who, while not walking my path, walked paths parallel to mine for a time. There are others who are walking very different paths but with whom I still enjoy a deep, powerful magickal relationship. There is another category that is often called “Solitary” and, while they face many of the same issues as the Solitary By Choice, they also have their own unique set of challenges. These are the folks who are looking for a coven or other formal group or tradition, but have not yet found their home. We do have a lot of the same challenges and I include them when I talk about Solitaries as much as I possibly can. I am neither proud nor ashamed of the fact that I am Solitary BY Choice – it is simply the path that has called me. I do not think that formal training with a coven is less or more legitimate than the Solitary path – they are just different ways to reach truth.
Those of us who choose a Solitary path can be a difficult group with which to work. When we speak of the trouble in organizing Pagans as “herding cats” it’s never truer than when dealing with the dedicated Solitary. Many of us are proud of our independence and may stubbornly cling to it beyond the bounds of logic. Those who are forced to be Solitary by geography (or other factors) may not always possess the same type of fierce independence. They may be seeking out the companionship, guidance, and structure of a coven or group – things studiously avoided by some who are Solitary By Choice.
There are a few rare individuals who straddle this line and both belong to a coven and walk a Solitary path at the same time. For most of us, the Solitary nature of our practices simply demands that we walk our paths alone. Those of us who practice this way see it as a type of freedom, although we have to recognize that there are things that can be easily accomplished with group practice that are difficult or impossible for the Circle of One. This doesn’t mean that we never work with others. Like all Pagans, we tend to share and learn from one another. Sometimes we gather, stand in circle together, and may work very intimate magick. At other times, some Solitaries may participate in public rituals with dozens of people they barely know. Being “Solitary”doesn’t mean being “alone” or “isolated”. It’s the path that is Solitary, not the person. In fact, some Solitaries tend to do all ritual work with others, although they are not all on the same path. Until they find a coven or other appropriate group, many who are Solitary By Circumstance will use this same approach.